It is hard to break from academia, and yet it is not impossible. To realize and decide that an academic career was no longer for me was difficult and daunting at the same time. Breaking from academia means leaving behind an entire life, the only one I have known for the last 18 years. Despite all the twists and turns of my postdoc career and all the disappointments and frustrations, I have tried and struggled to stay in academia. In the end, the pursuit just didn’t work out, and now, it is time to move on. So here I am, like most of you, trying to find where I belong career-wise.
One of the hardest things about my journey as a postdoc is to be far from my family and my Island. There is no day that passes by that I don’t miss my family. For the last nine years, I have missed birthdays, anniversaries, arguments, and laughter with loved ones. I still get homesick. Sometimes I wonder if this path is worth all the sacrifices. A part of me feels as if my journey hasn’t ended yet: that if I am patient enough, I will find a job where I can be happy and feel accomplished while living a balanced life. Some days I feel completely lost and alone. Then, I remember the love and support of my family and friends along with the reasons why I truly love science, and I become hopeful again.
Looking back at those nine years, I realize that my PhD and postdoctoral journey was more about discovering the kind of person I am and the kind of person I would like to be. I found out that I am strong and capable of doing what I put my mind to. It is not healthy to live according other people’s expectations from you – especially after earning your PhD. I’ve decided that I won’t let my life be defined by how many experiments I do in a day, or how many extra hours I stay in the lab, or how many papers I published. Instead, I want my life to be defined by the number of nights I go to sleep confident that what I did that day was meaningful – that what I did that day can make a difference in somebody else’s life. I want a career where I can use my scientific knowledge and my skill sets to reach out and help people outside the lab.
Most people rarely stop to look at how far they have come and think about what they have sacrificed along the way, yet it is meaningful to reflect. Why? Because finding the right career path and making the right choices requires having a clear idea of who you are as a person: a clear idea of your trajectory and goals, of what is important to you, and of what you are willing to sacrifice. Knowing all of these values will give you the strength and confidence to take the necessary steps to set the right strategy to pursue the career of your dreams. Companies are looking to hire people with not just the technical skills, but also the confidence, motivation and willingness to learn and adapt, including the ability to be part of a team and the determination to succeed. In the process of finding your dream job and dream life, you will have doubts and go through rejections, but know that all of it is completely normal and part of a learning experience. The benefit of rejections is that they can help you to re-evaluate your strategy and career goal. Rejections can guide you to find the right direction to follow in your career search. I would like to think that with every rejection, like with breakups in relationships, I get closer to finding the life and happiness I deserve.
